Originally posted 02/06/2016 on http://www.teridmc. The post was edited to reflect current views.

“My father said to me, “Miguel, when you understand that you are perfect just the way you are, you will see that everything is perfect just the way it is.” – Living a Life of Awareness, Don Miguel Ruiz, Jr,

Yesterday I had another opportunity to come to terms with being perfect.  But this time, I got it.

You see I’ve spent the better part of two days trying to create and launch a landing page to promote my eBook – “The Beginners Guide to Mapping Your Cancer Journey.”  There is a reason IT consultants make money doing this work.  But having a shortage of funds and an abundance of brains, I decided I could make this happen.  I did the research, gathered all my tools and started the journey.  Sixteen hours, two phone calls and several visits to the forum, I got it 95% completed (Word Press backend is down). I was able to send an auto-responder to all my guests that currently reside on my email list.  What a celebration! Bring out the confetti!

Five minutes after I hit the go button, I got an email from one of my friends stating that she did not attend my training and questioning why she was getting the email.  The auto-responder was supposed to be a thank you for joining my email list and provide access to a download of my ebook.  It did that, but the subject line of the email said: “Thank You For Attending My Training.” For heaven’s sake! I immediately created another email that apologized for the first and sent that out.

Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.  Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.  – Philippians 4:8-9

My emotions were all over the map – embarrassment and stupidity all wrapped up in shame – I’m not good enough.  At the core of that shame was fear.  I feared that I would be thought incompetent, or worse alienated from the very people I was trying to impress.  I feared that these people would punish me in some form or fashion.  I lost my peace. I lost my joy.

The truth is none of us reach perfection.  We all fall short of the glory of God, for only God is perfect and we will never reach that standard.  We spend endless hours trying to reach that standard, trying to impress God and others.  By accepting Christ as our savior we already have the righteousness of God.

My self-shame didn’t last long.  I begin to praise God for having the ability to configure the system.  Few people my age would even attempt such a feat; that God would bless me with the knowledge and skills to make it happen on my own is truly admirable and worthy of all his praise.  When I refocused my attention on God and his gifts to me it was hard to maintain a state of fear. My renewed confidence lay in knowing that no matter what I’ve done, I had God’s grace and mercy extended to me through Jesus Christ.  And just as quickly as I allowed the gremlins to steal my joy, I reclaimed my power.

The next time you find yourself in doubt about your perfection, here are three steps you might want to take to move into peace and harmony with yourself:

  1. Release any attachments to what you believe to be the perfect you, and focus on the perfect gift you are today in the eyes of God. God made you in His image and God is not about imperfection.
  2. Stop judging yourself for not meeting the expectations of others and focus on what is good and noteworthy about the situation. There is always something to thank God for; look for it and give thanks.

And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. – Colossians 3:14 ESV

  1. Love yourself and be in God’s perfect harmony.

People find it easy to blame themselves when something goes wrong that cannot be readily explained. “There must be something wrong with me.”

“I must be a bad person.”

“I lack the intelligence to make it happen.”

What you are really saying is that “I’m not perfect.” It is not easy to stop the blaming and shaming.  Moving from fear to God’s peace and joy starts with renewed focus on God, God’s love for you and the love you have for yourself.  Self-love starts with self-compassion.  If you don’t know how to be compassionate towards yourself, you can learn.  As it states in God’s Word (Philippian 4:9) practice so that you will know the peace of God.  Pray that God will help you to be patient with yourself.  Have faith that God’s grace and mercy through Jesus Christ covers you.  Love yourself as God Loves you daily.

You therefore must be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect. Matthew 5:58

If you’d like a free copy of my eBook, contact me at

One thought on “The Practice of Living Joyful: Perfection

  1. Release attachments stop judging and love yourself… that is what i have learned now that I am older (49). Born and raised Christian (1990) woman, read the bible 7x and love your perspective of writing on our Lord. Bless you!! ♥


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